Wednesday, October 28, 2009

All I Need to Know I Learned from AA.

Looking across the room, Jim looked like an average guy. Sure, his beard was a little untrimmed, and he was missing a couple of teeth. But Jim has a disease, and he isn’t afraid to admit it. As soon as he sat down, he exclaimed, “Hello. I’m Jim…and I’m an alcoholic.”

I attended an alcoholic anonymous group called “2nd Chance Group” to fulfill a requirement for my Crisis Counseling class. Before attending the meeting, I felt very tense and worried. I was not sure how they would accept my presence at their meeting. However, a man named Jim, the leader of the group, offered me his hand and a hot cup of coffee as soon as I had walked in the door. Soon, I had met almost the entire group before the meeting even began. The people in the group were very inviting and welcoming. It was very interesting to observe the members of the group interact with each other as they walked in the room. Everyone was greeted with a smile, hug, and a pat on the back. Even first time visitors, who were nervous and felt out of place, were welcomed the same. I would say that the overall atmosphere of the group was that of acceptance, love, and community.

There was a very large difference in age between the members of the group. There was an 87-year-old man who had been sober for over 40 years, a 49-year-old man who was drunk at the meeting, a 30-year-old man who used to be involved in church leadership and several women in their fifties. There were about 15 people in the entire group who were dealing with alcoholism.

Going to an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting was a real eye-opener. It was amazing to see the acceptance and love found in the 2nd Chance AA group. Their willingness to come forward and admit that they have a disease that they cannot deal with by themselves was truly extraordinary. Sometimes in the church, people try to pretend that they are perfect Christians, and they ignore the fact that they are messed-up people in need of a Messiah. I think that is were AA gets it right. They know they need help, because they have a problem they can’t seem to shake.

The MESSiah came to enter into our MESSES and bring us hope and healing. To even suggest we aren't a mess really implies we have no need for a MESSiah, and you are slapping Jesus in the face and spitting on his sacrifice.

If Christians began to mimic Jim, as mentioned at the beginning, great things would happen. I think we all need to join with Jim in saying, “Hello. My name is _______…and I’m a sinner.”

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Darn You, Kink in the Neck!

Have you ever seen a shooting star? If I had to guess, I bet 99.995% of people have seen one. Unfortunately, I am a part of that .005% that has never witnessed the awesomeness of a shooting star. This past Sunday the college group I am a part of had a bonfire where we ate some hotdogs and had a worship time around the fire. During the singing, I leaned back in my chair, and I just stared into the dark sky. As I continued to just gaze into the expanse of darkness, stars began to appear. One after another, they popped up. First they were dim, but over time they began to get brighter and brighter until it seemed like the entire night sky was stringed with constellations made from tiny beautiful balls of light.

It was awesome in its purest since of the definition. I don't know if you have ever taken the time to just sit back and look at the night sky, but I strongly encourage you to. If you live in the city, take a road trip 20 minutes outside the city. Park and lay down on the roof of your car and just stare at the sky on a cloudless night. It is truly indescribable. Sunday night after staring into the sky for about 5 minutes, it seemed like the stars were literally lowered enough that I could reach out and grab a cluster of them. I even found myself reaching out to try and grab one, but some girl started staring at me so I played it off like I was stretching.

When the girl finally quit staring at me, I went back to star gazing. While I was looking up in the sky, the guy doing worship started playing a song with the lyrics,

I want to know you, I want to hear your voice,
I want to know you more.
I want to touch you, I want to see your face,
I want to know you more.

When I was singing those words, I feld like God was answering my prayer right in front of me. I could see his artistic masterpiece, and in turn, I felt like I knew him better. It is really good to be reminded of God's creativity and his creation. I'll be the first to tell you that I am not an "outdoors man." I know that is contradictory to every book ever written about manliness, but I really enjoy the comforts of air conditioning and accessible toilet paper. But I really enjoyed seeing this side of God. It was beautiful.

Oh, and by the way, I never saw a shooting star that night. There were several of them, but everytime one shot across the sky I was trying to get the kink out of my neck from staring straight up in the sky. Bum deal if you ask me.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Jim the Golfer

Today I went golfing with my good buddy Ryan Hicks, and he ended up beating me by one stroke! It came down to the last hole, and I totally blew it.

I love golfing, but at the same time I freakin' hate the sport! It is one of the most frustrating things to do in life. Think about it...you are trying to a hit a small white ball that is 1.6 inches in diameter into a small hole that is only about 4 inches wide. And you are doing this with a stick. From about 120 yards away, you are supposed to make this tiny ball fall into the small cup with a stick in just 3 shots!! I think this is Preposterous.....but I'll still pay an outrageous amount of money to play the sport.

About a month ago, I was golfing with my brother, Jim, at a place in Topeka. We started off playing with just the two of us, but around the fourth hole a forty-year-old man behind us asked if he could join us. He was quite a bit better than me and my brother, but we said if he was willing to put up with our poor play we would be glad to let him play with us. We came to find out his name was Jim as well and he too was a big Kansas Jayhawk fan.

After talking a lot about Jayhawk football and basketball and playing nine holes, my brother decdied to call it day. He had to get home and take care of some stuff, but I still wanted to play. So I asked Jim if it was okay if I joined him on the final 9 holes while my brother quit. He was fine with it, and chuckling he asked if we were going to play for money. Knowing he was way better at golf, I smartly declined.

We continued to play, and he continued to kick my butt (as you can tell, everyone beats me). I found out that Jim worked at the local casino. He also had a girlfriend with whom he had 2 children, and he planned on marrying her in the spring sometime. As we were nearing the end of the golf course, he opened up to me about his past relationships and how unhealthy they were. I felt the Holy Spirit urging me to talk to him about Christ and how much He loves him no matter where he had been. At first I just ignored the Spirit's tugging, but it began to grow stronger and stronger. But I never said a thing. All I could do was shake my head in acknowledgment of how crappy his life had been. A nod? Is that all I could offer Jim?

I totally wasted my chance to share the good news with Jim. Instead I apathetically took the easy way out and chose to ignore the Spirit's tugging.

Jim, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for basically spitting in your face and telling you that you weren't worthy my time or my pride. I was too afraid of what you would think of me if I brought up my Savior and my Lord. I want him to be your Lord too. I know I probably won't see you again, but if I run into you again on the golf course, I pray that I love you enough to tell you about my Jesus. I'm sorry Jim the golfer.

Am I being to harsh on myself? I don't think so. I shouldn't have wasted my opportunity to talk to Jim. Ephesians 5:15-16 says, "Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil." Who is your Jim?